Destiny’s Open Relationship Journey

This article is a summary of the YouTube video ‘Destiny and Melina on their open relationship’ by Lex Clips

Written by: Recapz Bot

Written by: Recapz Bot

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How does it work?
In the video, individuals explain open relationships, including challenges.

Key Insights

  • The individuals in the video are in an open relationship.
  • They explain that open relationships involve having one main partner but being allowed to see other people sexually.
  • They discuss the challenges and complications that come with being in an open relationship.
  • Jealousy arises when one person feels that the other is not giving them enough time or attention.
  • They highlight the different ways in which they engage with the world: one prefers peace and nature, while the other enjoys challenges and drama.
  • They navigate their differences by trying to understand each other's perspectives and finding activities they both enjoy.
  • The speaker mentions their difficulty in maintaining long-term relationships and the challenges they bring.
  • The discussion transitions to discussing AI and video games, suggesting that AI can potentially solve complex games with ease.

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Transcript

[00:00:00] One interesting aspect of your relationship is you’re in an open relationship. What’s that like? From a game theoretic simulation perspective, what went into that calculation? And like, how does that? Like how that started or?

Yeah, how did that start, sure. The only relationships I’ve ever done has been open relationships, since I was like in high school. Because I didn’t really understand like, why wouldn’t you be able to like, do other things with other people, but then just like have your main partner basically.

So what is an open relationship, generally speaking? That means you have one main partner? Not a monogamous relationship. Like you’re somehow allowed, like in different ways. You can see other people sexually.

Sexually, but like, there’s one main station. It doesn’t have to be there for some people, but like, I think it’s probably easier and we probably don’t really have time or the energy for like more than like one person to like really like.

What about like emotional? It’s really complicated. There’s a lot of complicated stuff going on under the hood there. Yeah. I think broadly speaking, you’ve got like polyamorous relationships and you’ve got like open relationships where polyamorous is like, oh, I’ve got like three different girlfriends and we all hang out or sometimes even live together or three boyfriends, whatever. And then you’ve got like open relationships, which is like, oh, you know, like you can basically hook up with other people. And then you’ve got like your main relationship and that’s it. I think ours is probably somewhere in the middle of that to where like, we’ve got like long-term friends. Some of them we hook up with and that’s kind of how we, yeah.

It’s a delicate dance that explodes every six months on itself. So it does explode, you guys fight over it? We fight over some things, yeah. It things happen, yeah. I think it’s mostly because a lot of people can’t handle it and they agree to something and then they realize that we’re way too cool and then they get really obsessed and they think that they can like get in there and then it gets really dramatic.

Have you figured it out? Like, it seems like a complicated deal. I feel like we figure out things more and more like when it comes to like, what’s a good person for us to hang out and what’s not a good person for us to hang out with? Or like, I probably have more opinions on like who he hangs out with because he likes the fucking psychos.

Yeah, so you like to surround- He likes the nut, like the crazy ones, like the baby trap sort of women. That’s the ones, and I don’t like that because that affects me. That affects your game theoretical relation.

Right, you like to surround yourself, like in general, you’ve talked about with crazy people. I say crazy and I really shouldn’t. It’s a humorous way. They’re very unstable. Very, can be unstable, but people that are very unique. Like when I meet this person, that’s like- Not boring. Yeah, not boring, yeah. And you said that you’re progressively becoming not boring yourself. No, I think I’m pretty stable. I don’t let them affect me much, but-

So you don’t think they affect your- No, if I’ve said that, I said it jokingly. I think I’ve like, I’ve got my stuff like really well figured out. It’s what allows me to engage with people like this so easily because I can engage, I can make them feel seen and heard. And then if it gets insane, I can cut off and I can be chill. Very few things affect me in the longterm.

Do you guys experience jealousy? Usually whenever I feel like he’s not spending the amount of time that I’m asking for and he spends it on his video games or his stream or he sees someone else more than he sees me or something like that, that would not be good. Because then it affects our relationship.

Do you have a good sense of like, is it literally time or is it the energy put into the- It’s probably like, if he’s with me, that like the attention in the time, like when he hangs out with me and then there’s also probably the time. So if I feel like something else is distracting too much, like it could be work or it could be a friend or it could be anything. Like if I feel like it starts to take away from like me, then I’m having an issue with it. I don’t think he really cares much. I guess the only jealousy you experience is probably when you feel like, like if I get upset about him seeing someone too much and then I go see someone more, and then he’s like, why can’t I go see my friend more, like as much as you? So like, that’s the sort of like thing that we’re trying to navigate on, I guess. I think we are like diametrically opposed sometimes in terms of how we view like engagement with people or engagement with the world sometimes.

So like on her end of the spectrum, like a perfect week for her might be like being in a cabin, watching like fireflies at night, going hiking every morning, going swimming at the beach, because it’s like, you’re taking in like the grandeur of nature. You’re like connected with yourself. You’re like very at peace. Everything is like chill and cool. There’s the wind, the feeling of nature, everything. That’s like her peak living experience.

I like being present. Yeah, and like my peak experiences are like people trying to destroy my life, like the challenge of like navigating a really complicated discussion, like several different dramatic events unfolding that might end my career. Like these things are like very, I like the stress and the action and the entertainment and everything’s like very cool for me. So when we’re together, she generally wants me to be like more chill, but if I don’t feel like I’m being like stimulated a lot, then it’s easy for like my mind to wander. To wander somewhere else. That’s kind of the issue. It can be a very different way of like engaging with.

So how can you find happiness in the stillness? I feel like if we’re just like aware of it and we’re trying our best, like whenever we like we’re supposed to do this one thing. So let’s say that we wanna go to New York and I’m like, we should just like go out and do this one specific thing. We try to find something that he enjoys doing. Like now that we’re in Texas, we can go shooting or do something fun that he enjoys then we can do it. And then I think like, just like for me also to be aware that like when he spends lots of time on crazy people, it’s not because he like loves them or wants to be with them. It’s just because he likes having his life destroyed. Like you said, which I don’t really do. It’s just a completely different thing. So like for me to like understand more like how he’s thinking because it’s so different from mine and for him to understand how I’m thinking about things and like what I prioritize in my life, I think that’s like how we navigate. But I think it’s good. I think the differences can be good. Like when we’re finding a way, yeah.

Well, I think you’re relatable. More of a human than you’re an AI. No, I’m definitely very difficult to get along with. Like I always tell people that, that like if you’re dating me for like more than a few years, like you get like an award for that. It’s like a war zone that you’ve survived. Absolutely. That you’re like a veteran, you get medals and stuff. And it’s always like, I think there’s probably been like six different, I don’t think she says it anymore, but there were like six different times in our relationship where she’s like, is it always like this? Is this actually real? Yeah. And like every next year it’s like- You lied in the beginning about that. Like you were lying about that. Well, it got worse. You were like, nah, it’s just like right now I’m having a huge argument online about saying the N-word in private. It’s just going to be like this and I’m going to be streaming 24 hours a day. And I’m like, when are you going to go to bed? It’s been a week. Yeah.

What is this? Did playing League come into this? A little bit, but I’m clean. I’m clean of League like six months right now. What do you hate about League of Legends? I never got- The humans. Well, speaking of which, my participation in League involved on the robot side. Good. Because there’s- That’s an improvement. Both with StarCraft II and League of Legends because OpenAI and DeepMind both participated in creating bots in those. I was a professional StarCraft II player, so I remember when the AI started to play. It’s interesting the types of restrictions that you would have to put on like a gaming robot to make it like functional and not totally unfair to the other side. Yeah, to make it human-like. Yeah

This article is a summary of the YouTube video ‘Destiny and Melina on their open relationship’ by Lex Clips