The Art of Seduction: 8-Minute Summary by Robert Greene

This article is a summary of the YouTube video ‘The Art of Seduction Summarized in Under 8 Minutes by Robert Greene’ by Robert Greene

Written by: Recapz Bot

Written by: Recapz Bot

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How does it work?
To seduce, learn non-verbal language, lower walls, create curiosity.

Key Insights

  • Seduction is compared to a non-verbal language that needs to be learned and mastered.
  • People in the 21st century have thick walls around them, making them resistant and defensive.
  • The goal in seduction is to lower those walls and enter their mind and inner space.
  • The ultimate power in seduction is when someone thinks about you even when you're not present.
  • Seduction is primarily non-verbal and involves body language, energy, and charisma.
  • Being too obvious in seduction can make people more resistant, so subtlety is important.
  • The language of seduction includes gestures, surprise, and thoughtful gifts.
  • Listening carefully helps understand someone's likes and dislikes to give them a meaningful gift.
  • Creating mystery and sending mixed signals can be exciting and intriguing.
  • Balancing absence and presence is crucial to maintain interest and curiosity.
  • Seduction involves a game of psychology and entering into someone's mind and spirit.
  • Mastering the art of seduction can make someone attractive and able to seduce almost anyone.

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Transcript

Think of seduction as a language. It is a language that is mostly non-verbal, and your game is to learn that language, to master it.

This is my second book, The Art of Seduction, which came out in 2001, and I’m happy to say just recently we’ve sold over a million copies of this book, so there you go.

So I want you to think of seduction in the following way. The people around you, all around you in your daily life, they have these kind of walls that are erected to protect themselves from intruders, protect them from advertisers, to protect them from people who are meddling in their life, to protect them from all the other intrusions that are continually distracting them. People, particularly in the 21st century, are very defensive. They have very thick walls around them.

They’re not necessarily interested in who you are. They’re not interested in your ideas, in having a relationship with you, in anything about you. They’re naturally resistant to you. The game in seduction is to lower those walls, to make them thinner and thinner, to find penetrating points so you can enter inside their mind, inside their defenses. And so, the ultimate power is when you’re not there, when after an encounter with you or whatever, they’re thinking about you when you’re not there. You have entered their mind, you have entered their inner space, and you’ve occupied, in a positive way hopefully, their inner worlds, and they’re thinking about you, even though you’re not there. That is the game, the art of seduction, okay?

Now, think of seduction as a language. That’s what I try and tell people in the art of seduction. It is a language that is mostly non-verbal, and your game is to learn that language, to master it, much as you would master French or whatever other language there is, okay?

So, what is this language? Well, it’s a language of gesture. It’s a language of body language. It’s a language of energy that you feel off of another person. So, if someone is trying to seduce you, or you’re trying to seduce someone, and you’re too obvious about it, and it’s too clear what you’re up to, and you’re saying all the right cliched lines that people say in order to seduce, it just makes those walls thicker and thicker and thicker. It’s too clear. People become more and more resistant, right? But if they don’t even know that you’re trying to seduce, if it’s something that’s in your energy, it is in your personality, you don’t have to say a word. You have charisma. You are a siren. You are a rake. You are the natural, all the nine types of seduces that I illustrate in there. Then you don’t even have to try. It’s something that emanates from your personality, and it attracts people to you without you ever saying a word.

So, part of that language is your own energy, your own kind of confidence and inner security that emanates out of you, and that draws people to you, and that is incredibly seductive. It is a language of gestures.

So, when you go on a date or you take someone somewhere, it’s not what you say and everything that you do. It’s the place that you take them to. It’s not something that they expect. It’s a surprise. It’s a place that they’ve never been to before that’s different, that’s not predictable. That is part of the seductive language.

When you give them a gift, it’s not a gift that’s obvious, that is flowers or something like that, or something that costs a lot of money. It’s a gift that shows that you’re thinking about them, that you understand their spirit. So, for instance, I tell people, listen carefully to the other person. They’re going to say things about what they love, about their likes, their dislikes. So, they’re going to reveal some of their personality. You want to get them to talk a lot, and you don’t hardly say anything. In the course of revealing something that they love, a light bulb goes on in your head. You go, I can give them a gift after a couple of weeks of seeing them that reflects this particular thing they mentioned once that reveals to them that I was listening, that I understood, that I absorbed their idea, their spirit. And I go, wow, this person was actually hearing me. How thoughtful, right? It’s a gesture. You don’t have to say anything.

Okay, on and on, on and on. You’re learning these languages. You are learning what excites people, what triggers their level of fascination, what would repel them and repulse them. So, you want to create a degree of mystery. You want to send mixed signals. They don’t know exactly who you are. There’s an element of, I don’t really know this person. You know, what they do tomorrow, I can’t really predict. Wow, how exciting. So, in the course of that, you’re thinking about them. It’s a language of absence and presence. If you’re too much in people’s face, if you’re texting them every day, if you’re emailing them and calling them all the time, there’s no sense of mystery. They can’t, you’re not giving them any space. But if you allow two days or three days to go by where you don’t call them, all right, you might think it’s a little bit cruel, but no, that’s part of seduction. It’s part of the mating game. Don’t worry about cruelty. Cruelty is part of seduction, actually. You have to be a little bit cruel, okay? So, you wait a few days. In that space, they’re going, maybe he or she doesn’t like me that much. Maybe there’s something I said that was wrong. They start thinking about you, and they start trying to think about what they can do to please you. You’ve got them then. You’ve seduced them. The moment they’re starting to think about you, that’s half the game. And if you’re constantly in their face, you can’t allow that to happen. But if you’re too absent, if two weeks go by and you’re never there, you’re just going to make them angry. You’re just going to make them forget you. They’re going to think that you’re not trustworthy. You have to know the delicate balance between absence and presence, when to be there and when to disappear for a day or two, right? Not to answer their texts right away. Give them a little space to fantasize about you, to think what you might be doing in your absence, on and on and on.

A language of gesture, of behavior, of things that you do, of places that you take them to, about your energy, about when you’re there and when you’re not there, the level of mystery that you can. If you can master that language and get people to think about you and be fascinated with you, nothing else matters. You don’t have to be the handsomest and most beautiful woman in the world. You will seduce them because seduction is a game of psychology. It’s a game of entering into their spirit, entering into their mind space, and making them think about you.

You master that game and you’ll be able to seduce almost anyone. So that is basically the art of seduction as I’ve laid out in my book.

This article is a summary of the YouTube video ‘The Art of Seduction Summarized in Under 8 Minutes by Robert Greene’ by Robert Greene